Tackling alcoholism and bulimia with Faith
"I spent a year or two in a constant state of inebriation, besides those moments when I was sober enough to find some food and throw it up.”
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Anna Jolliff
- Jan 9, 2021
- 7 min
Thirty days sober with Harper
"I felt like I was just existing. Even if I was just smoking weed, I was not feeling things."
Anna Jolliff
- Dec 31, 2020
- 2 min
Ten things I loved in 2020
I laid aside my fears for just long enough to sign my first lease with a partner, in my first relationship with a woman.
Anna Jolliff
- Dec 19, 2020
- 10 min
A little bit addicted to everything
“My ‘ism started well before the use of alcohol,” says Kristen. “Well before the first time I used.”
Anna Jolliff
- Oct 24, 2020
- 4 min
An alcoholic researcher's perspective on alcohol research
Most researchers have a habit of putting themselves under the microscope. “Mesearch,” it’s called. It’s when the person with an eating...
Anna Jolliff
- May 15, 2020
- 4 min
I tried AA on Zoom
On March 16th, I attended my last in-person AA meeting. In the month leading up to that, meetings had grown progressively empty. We sat...
Anna Jolliff
- Apr 17, 2020
- 3 min
On the urge to "get productive" in quarantine
Lately I've been posting here a little less. The reason is not that I haven't been writing. Rather, I simply haven't been writing the...
Anna Jolliff
- Mar 20, 2020
- 6 min
On belonging and the miracle of choice with Chris
Look for the similarities, not the differences. From an outsider’s perspective, Chris and I don't appear to have much in common. He’s a...
Anna Jolliff
- Mar 13, 2020
- 4 min
What does COVID-19 mean for alcoholics?
To be clear, I’m not asking what COVID-19 means for practicing alcoholics. I’m assuming that, for people who still drink, the virus won’t...
Anna Jolliff
- Feb 14, 2020
- 2 min
Sober on Valentine's Day
Maybe Valentine's Day stress you out. Maybe you can’t imagine a sober one. Or maybe it's no big deal for you; maybe you'd even forgotten...
Anna Jolliff
- Feb 7, 2020
- 4 min
How to quit drinking in 10 steps
The other day, my girlfriend asked if I ever thought I would make it to four years sober. That’s a harder question than you might think....
Anna Jolliff
- Jan 24, 2020
- 3 min
I'm four years sober today
This morning I woke early to stomach pains. These are the natural result of a body in transition. About four months ago, I began to...
Anna Jolliff
- Jan 17, 2020
- 3 min
How I know I'm alcoholic
Some days, my alcoholic mind plays tricks on me. “You never drank every day," my mind says. “You never had withdrawals.” “You haven’t...
Anna Jolliff
- Jan 10, 2020
- 3 min
Responsibility after relapse
These days, my home group is a women's newcomer meeting. I suppose it’s meant for those early in sobriety. With four years, I attend...
Anna Jolliff
- Dec 27, 2019
- 4 min
I went to 90 meetings in 90 days
A little over three months ago I moved home to Oregon. My Wisconsin sponsor suggested that, upon arrival, I attend 90 twelve step...
Anna Jolliff
- Oct 30, 2019
- 3 min
More boring drunkalogues
You’ve probably heard of imposter syndrome. That’s when you don’t feel like you deserve your seat at the table. You glance nervously...
Anna Jolliff
- Oct 16, 2019
- 3 min
The newcomer
Yesterday in a twelve step meeting, I sat across from a girl who felt like home. When she introduced herself to the group, I saw that she...
Anna Jolliff
- Oct 4, 2019
- 3 min
I'm an alcoholic and I moved states. Now what?
On September 16th, I began the drive from Madison to Newberg, Oregon. Minnesota, North Dakota, Montana, Washington, Home. I was moving...
Anna Jolliff
- Sep 17, 2019
- 3 min
6 things it's hard to say aloud (part 1)
On Sunday, I had the opportunity to share my story in a women’s recovery meeting. These days I rarely get nervous, largely because of...
Anna Jolliff
- Sep 6, 2019
- 3 min
Getting selfish to get sober?
In recovery, we’re always flirting with the idea of selfishness. There are the worried mothers wondering if it’s “selfish” to leave their...